Performed tonight. 
Was an ok crowd, tried out a new joke

Performed tonight.
Was an ok crowd, tried out a new joke

prettyboyshyflizzy:

1stdaughterofthechief:

prettyboyshyflizzy:

Just put these new rims on the whip.. yall like em ?

Lol these are too dope.

imma roll up to the mall real quick and scoop up all the honeys saying some lame corny shit
Me: “look at my rims and you can see yourself”
Girl: “Thats patrick”
Me: Nah baby, you a star 
Girl:

prettyboyshyflizzy:

1stdaughterofthechief:

prettyboyshyflizzy:

Just put these new rims on the whip.. yall like em ?

Lol these are too dope.

imma roll up to the mall real quick and scoop up all the honeys saying some lame corny shit

Me: “look at my rims and you can see yourself”

Girl: “Thats patrick”

Me: Nah baby, you a star 

Girl:

45,058 notes

fuckyeahretailrobin:

[Image Description: Background is several triangles in a circle like a pie alternating from true red, scarlet and black. A robin is sitting on his perch looking to the right.Top Text: “SEXIST.”Bottom Text: “CUSTOMERS.”]

I work at a movie/music store and we also buy and sell used merchandise. We have this one regular male customer who is extremely sexist and just a plain a-hole. He absolutely refuses to work with or even talk to a female associate. Unfortunately for him, the majority of our employees are female. 
First, he calls. I answer the phone with the usual, ” Thank you for calling, this is -insert store-, how may I help you?” To which he replies “I don’t care” and hangs up. 
Uhh okay then. 
Then he calls back and demands to speak to a manager. Our assistant manager, who is a woman, answers the phone since the store manager isn’t there yet. When she tells him this he says “I don’t want to speak to a stupid woman.”
I was outraged. The nerve of some people. I have no idea what to do about this. I want to keep my job, but at the same time I feel disgusting even talking to this guy. He isn’t an employee so I can’t file a complaint or anything. Sometimes just having to smile and be polite in the retail field really kills me.   

fuckyeahretailrobin:

[Image Description: Background is several triangles in a circle like a pie alternating from true red, scarlet and black. A robin is sitting on his perch looking to the right.

Top Text: “SEXIST.”

Bottom Text: “CUSTOMERS.”]

I work at a movie/music store and we also buy and sell used merchandise. We have this one regular male customer who is extremely sexist and just a plain a-hole. He absolutely refuses to work with or even talk to a female associate. Unfortunately for him, the majority of our employees are female. 

First, he calls. I answer the phone with the usual, ” Thank you for calling, this is -insert store-, how may I help you?” To which he replies “I don’t care” and hangs up.

Uhh okay then.

Then he calls back and demands to speak to a manager. Our assistant manager, who is a woman, answers the phone since the store manager isn’t there yet. When she tells him this he says “I don’t want to speak to a stupid woman.”

I was outraged. The nerve of some people. I have no idea what to do about this. I want to keep my job, but at the same time I feel disgusting even talking to this guy. He isn’t an employee so I can’t file a complaint or anything. Sometimes just having to smile and be polite in the retail field really kills me.   

67 notes

lickmyeyeballsss:

wesleh:

“In the fifth grade I was arrested from school and suspended for a week cause I made blueprints and plans and went through the classrooms stealing all the Goosebumps books. I was successful with three classrooms. The way I did it, every week I came home with a certain amount. I had numbers one through 73. Then I fucking got caught. And I was a little smartass, so I was like, What a coincidence! A black youth getting arrested for wanting to read. So I made a list of everyone I thought snitched on me, who I was going to kill and torture.” — Tyler, The Creator.

ily. childhood done right.

lickmyeyeballsss:

wesleh:

“In the fifth grade I was arrested from school and suspended for a week cause I made blueprints and plans and went through the classrooms stealing all the Goosebumps books. I was successful with three classrooms. The way I did it, every week I came home with a certain amount. I had numbers one through 73. Then I fucking got caught. And I was a little smartass, so I was like, What a coincidence! A black youth getting arrested for wanting to read. So I made a list of everyone I thought snitched on me, who I was going to kill and torture.” 
— Tyler, The Creator.

ily. childhood done right.

(Source: worldgonemad)

41,066 notes

cumleak:

"i’ll be speaking with my lawyer" is the adult version of saying "im telling mom"

12,628 notes

surethatspookilyhappened:

spliffmastergeneral:

the-spooky-dick-forest:

buzzfeed:

Need some last-minute Halloween costume inspiration? Here you go. 

cosplay at its funniest

It’s funny to dress up as Muslim women and disparage another’s culture? How very classically white.

They’re…… they’re ghosts….

😂

201,440 notes

ivaan-ffxiv:

deershadow:

i bet that cat doesn’t even game, it’s just doing it for attention. 

Fake gamer cats, ugh

ivaan-ffxiv:

deershadow:

i bet that cat doesn’t even game, it’s just doing it for attention. 

Fake gamer cats, ugh

(Source: uguused)

193,463 notes

Life hack

The buffet is $9 for lunch and $12 for dinner…after 4pm

Show up at 3:50 so you get dinner for the lunch prices

You’re welcome

z-co:

one of my coworkers got a call (i work in a call center/tech support) from a customer that was really scared because supposedly the mafia was hacking her computer and they were stalking her…when finally my coworker took remote control of the computer he couldn’t stop laughing because

image

85,809 notes

Anonymous said: How often do you masturbate?

concentrationlamp:

concentrationlamp:

hotwinger:

Not as much as I’d like to. I used to do it for maybe 2 or 3 hours a day. My life has been really busy lately, what with school and such, so I haven’t had much free time, unfortunately. I’d like to get back into it though, because I’ve just been really stressed out lately, and I could definitely use a release.

FUCK! WAIT! NO I THOUGHT THIS SAID “MEDITATE” GODDAMMIT FUCK SHIT

STOP REBLOGGING THIS I FUCKING THOUGHT IT SAID MEDITATE 

129,283 notes